Dumbass Right Here

So I haven't blogged in a while. This could be for the reason that I screwed up big time. I mean, I guess I really don't know why I did it. Maybe part of it was being stuck in my apartment too long, taking care of my sister, doing homework, sleeping and then waking up and doing it all over again. Maybe it was just too repetitive. Maybe I missed the spontaneous life I had back in Wisconsin. Connor. Vince. Josh. Annoying the shit out of Syd. Maybe I was feeling out of touch. With the world. With myself. But no matter why I did it, the main reason seems to be this: I'm a dumbass. Yep. That seems right.

Let's review, what good did going out and getting drunk and high off of my ass do?
-I got really sick
-I could have died because it was bad because I was on steroids
-I was close to alcohol poisoning which leads to death
-I figured out who I thought was my friend really isn't
-I made out with a guy (this guy mentioned there ^^)
-He told everyone at school we made out and know everyone thinks I'm gay, not that they didn't before
-It freaked out my mother and made her worry
-It made Emily worry and get mad at me
-It made Ayana angry
-It made Syd angry
-It made Connor and Vince angry
-It made me angry
-In general I pissed everyone off, including myself
-I got a C in physics instead of the A I had because I skipped out on the final when I was laying passed out from drinking

I could list more, but let's just say it did nothing but fuck everything up, including my mind. And now what do I do? I sit here and continue to listen to Taylor Swift's "Back to December."

I'm sorry Emily. I'm sorry everyone...